There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
Randomize
