I'll bet she douches with gravy.
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize
