i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
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