We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi.
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
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