is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
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