would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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