i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
Randomize
