I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
