Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
