Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
Randomize