So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
Randomize
