I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
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