i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
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