Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
