He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
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