Its about making memories worth repressing
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
Randomize
