Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize
