you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
You ruined the universe
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Randomize
