whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
