I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
So I was throwing up in this fancy toilet at a party last night, when he decided it would be funny to flush it. It was a beday. I had to walk out with toilet water and regurgitated rumpleminze all over my face and shirt.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
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