what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize