decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
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