dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
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