you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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