thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
Randomize
