WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
Randomize
