Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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