oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
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