don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
He? As in you personified your dick?
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
Randomize
