Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
Randomize
