we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
he was CRYING into my vagina
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
I forget how to act sober
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
Randomize