I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize