I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
