I want to walk on stilts...naked
Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
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