if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
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