my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
I have aggressive nipples.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
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