he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
Randomize
