So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Randomize