Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
