I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
Randomize