quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
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