it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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