so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
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