I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
