Your tits are I can't wait for
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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