At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
If I die, sorry about rent.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
