Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize
