Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
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