Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
