:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
Randomize
